I hear “No problem” far more often.

  • Drusenija@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    Here’s a response I’ve seen about this around the net for a while now that feels right.

    "Actually, the “you’re welcome/no problem” issue is simply a linguistics misunderstanding. Older ppl tend to say “you’re welcome,” younger ppl tend to say “no problem.” This is because for older people the act of helping or assisting someone is seen as a task that is not expected of them, but is them doing extra, so it’s them saying, ‘I accept your thanks because I know I deserve it.”

    “No problem, however, is used because younger people feel not only that helping or assisting someone is a given and expected but also that it should be stressed that your need for help was no burden to them (even if it was).”

    “Basically, older people think help is a gift you give, younger people think help is a requirement.”

    https://didyouknowfacts.com/why-young-people-say-no-problem-instead-of-youre-welcome-and-why-older-people-hate-it/

  • BluJay320@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    11 months ago

    I see “no problem” as nicer. If I say that, I’m expressing that I really don’t mind, and there’s no need to thank me. No problem, as in I had no problem with doing this thing

    “You’re welcome” feels more like “I appreciate you thanking me, because I went out of my way to do this”, if that makes any sense

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      Except “no problem” traditionally means “no problem [despite this situation containing a likely problem]”.

      It means the person being thanked has gone outside their set of responsibilities to help you.

      Like “Thanks for letting us borrow your spare tire so we could get our car back to town” -> “no problem”.

      Here the other person had no responsibility to help with the others’ flat tire, much less lend out a piece of their own safety equipment.

      “You’re welcome” is the one which means “It is perfectly expected in our current roles that I would have provided this”.

  • Ioughttamow@kbin.run
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    11 months ago

    The appropriate response is that the debt must be repaid in kind, within the fortnight, lest their house fall into disrepute

  • Dippy@beehaw.org
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    10 months ago

    Language changes over time, and that’s the new etiquette. Though No Problem tends to feel less compulsory to me and so I feel more genuine saying it. Enjoy the world as it changes, because it’ll change just as much if you don’t enjoy it

  • pruwyben@discuss.tchncs.de
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    11 months ago

    Years ago, I had to do customer service training for a job, and one thing they said is to always say “you’re welcome” instead of “no problem”, because some people think “no problem” is rude. But I think it’s a generational thing, and it’s kind of the opposite with younger folks.

    • Nyanix@lemmy.ca
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      11 months ago

      I think a lot of younger generation, myself included, prefer casual responses, conflating professionalism with being rude, slimy, or otherwise malintentioned

    • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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      10 months ago

      During my years in retail exactly one customer ever had a problem with me saying “no problem”. He also said he was an assassin. That’s not a joke. This old, fat boomer said I shouldn’t say ‘no problem’ because some people might take it to mean ‘yes problem’ and then told me he kills people for a living.

      That’s the stability of people that can’t understand the meaning of words. If I go to a police station and say I am a serial killer vs I’m not a serial killer, I don’t expect them to react the same…

    • Mongostein@lemmy.ca
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      11 months ago

      I think we collectively decided that “you’re welcome” doesn’t make sense. Welcome to what??

    • illi@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      I had to do one communucation trainung where the trainer saud that saying “no problem” should not be used, because it implies there might’ve been a problem. I was not convinced though.

      • EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        11 months ago

        Wow. facepalm The words literally say there’s no problem, and yet it somehow implies there is a problem? Talk about overthinking what someone is saying.

        This is why I often hate neurotypical communication styles. The world would be a lot more straightforward if people just said what they meant. Jesus fucking Christ on a motorbike…

      • blackbrook@mander.xyz
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        11 months ago

        Then “your welcome” implies you might not be welcome. Seems like either both work or both are problematic, he can’t have it both ways.

        • illi@lemm.ee
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          11 months ago

          Agreed. Might also be because “problem” is a word with negative conotation? Idk, I don’t see a problem (hah) myself

      • Snot Flickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        11 months ago

        When a chic-fil-a worker hits you with that, you gotta one-up them with “No! The pleasure is all mine!” and then hit the gas, peeling out cackling because you stole that pleasure motherfuckaaaaah.

        (Or better, don’t go to chic-fil-a)

      • creamed_eels@toast.ooo
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        11 months ago

        I have a friend who loses his mind when anyone uses this (who isn’t Australian.) He is also not Australian, not sure what his burden is

        • jkrtn@lemmy.ml
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          11 months ago

          I’m now weirdly self-aware of how often I say that. It is probably better if I don’t meet your friend.

  • nutsack@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    why don’t we add more useless sayings to this throaway conversation script?

    thank you you’re welcome thank you for welcoming me you’re thanked as well welcome to my house allow me to vacuum your dick

  • DLSantini@lemmy.ml
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    11 months ago

    I don’t say it because you are, in fact, not welcome. I finish interactions with customers, even when they say thank you to me, by saying “thank you, have a nice day”, as my non fireable version of “I’ll thank you to kindly fuck off now.”

  • bfg9k@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    I always go with ‘No worries’ or ‘All good’, because ‘You’re welcome’ feels too formal for everyday conversations, plus as another comment mentioned it’s a generational thing as well

    • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      “You’re welcome” is too much of a commitment for me. What if I don’t want to help next time but already told the other party they were welcome to my help? Formally revoking that welcome sounds really awkward.

      “No problem” is just more honest because it keeps the scope to the current episode. Unless it was a problem but I’m glossing over it to just end the episode, in which case it’s still better than “you’re welcome”.

  • Pandantic [they/them]@midwest.social
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    10 months ago

    Hey do you guys know what “you’re welcome” is in Spanish? “De Nada” which means “of nothing”. Sounds almost like, “no problem”.

    This phrase isn’t new, either. It’s been around for centuries, just like the first instances of “you’re welcome”.

  • Ænima@lemm.ee
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    11 months ago

    I saw a post a while back that said millennials use “no problem” instead of “you’re welcome” because no problem signifies the act was of little effort and was no problem to do. However, “you’re welcome” implies entitlement, as in you are welcomed to my time and effort, or some shit. I don’t remember, but yeah, just a “generational thing.”

    So yeah it’s a “can I speak to your manager” boomer thing, as usual. Only group I ever see getting their panties in a wad over a phrase. Just like “Merry Christmas” changing to “Happy Holidays” erases their religion or dares to put other similar holidays, in the same approximate time of the year on equal footing, making their religious holiday less significant.

  • macabrett@lemmy.ml
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    11 months ago

    you can say “you’re welcome”, its no problem

    you can also say “no problem”

    hope this helps, you’re welcome

  • Donebrach@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    You’re welcome to use language however you want, regardless of what the algorithm decides.

  • Rhaedas@kbin.social
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    11 months ago

    Languages change over time. As long as the intent is clear, don’t get hung up on what is and isn’t “correct”. “You’re welcome” probably was seen as extreme at some point itself.

    • Ephera@lemmy.ml
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      11 months ago

      I mean, I’m fully on board with not getting hung up on what’s “correct”, but these are words that do have a specific meaning and I do find it interesting that the preferred choice of words shifts (even if it is only caused by relatively few people, that actually think about their word choice there).

      Specifically, “no problem” is kind of like saying “there’s nothing to thank me for”. And ultimately, it kind of says “I don’t expect something in return”.

      Whereas “you’re welcome” acknowledges that yes, I did help you, you are right to thank me for that, and also kind of “I would appreciate you returning the favor”.

      My personal theory is that the change in language happens, because we have a lot more contacts with strangers, either in big/foreign cities or online.
      When you help a stranger, you know upfront that they won’t be able to return the favor, simply because you won’t stay in contact. So, not only should it definitely not be a personal sacrifice for you to help them, it also feels right to communicate that they don’t owe you anything, so that they can go on in their life.

      • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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        11 months ago

        No “You’re welcome” means “You deserved that thing already”.

        That’s why the Spanish equivalent is “de nada”. It means “You’re thanking me for something that was already yours”

        • Ephera@lemmy.ml
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          11 months ago

          I don’t disagree with your interpretation of “you’re welcome”. At the end of the day, it is still a phrase which sort of weakens a “thanks”, out of politeness.
          I’m saying that there’s a difference between “you deserved that thing already” and “there was nothing I did, which anyone would need to be deservent of”.

          And “de nada” is actually a bad example here. Yes, the dictionary will tell you that it’s a valid translation for “you’re welcome”, but the actual words translate verbatim to “of nothing”, as in “you’re thanking me for nothing”. So, “de nada” is very much like “no problem” in Spanish.

      • Eranziel@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        I kind of disagree with you, in that when I think about the standalone meanings of the words in each phrase, I think they do say the same thing.

        The meaning of the words “You are welcome [to the help I gave you]” implies, to me, that there wasn’t actually anything to offer thanks over. You’re acknowledging their thanks, but telling them that they are welcome to take/use whatever it is you’re talking about. [EDIT: normally when someone tells me I’m welcome to something, I feel less compelled to ask and thank in the future. “You’re welcome to anything in the fridge”, for example.]

        It does not imply, to me, that I would appreciate them returning the favour. That might be implied meaning in the phrase, but it’s definitely not what those words mean by themselves.

        In any case, “You’re welcome”, “no problem”, “no worries”, etc… are all idioms that mean something different than what their individual words mean. The phrases as a whole carry a different meaning than the words themselves suggest.