No, you all don’t want to do the very easy thing kf asking permission to discuss these things because you want to sexually harass women into conversations they don’t want to have.

Not an addiction.

What?

No, that’s not what he said. And there’s tons of studies.

2nd sentence from your own link:

The concept is contentious;[2][3][4] as of 2023, sexual addiction is not a clinical diagnosis in either the DSM or ICD medical classifications of diseases and medical disorders

https://www.insidehook.com/sex-and-dating/sex-addiction-not-real-and-time-stop-calling

https://www.vice.com/en/article/theres-no-such-thing-as-a-sex-addiction/

It’s not real, it’s just weird abstinence / No Fap rebranded.

The “Is it an ADDICTION??” Pearl clutching from the 90s needs to go too.

Define “sect.”

They literally do specifically name groups, I’ve posted this repeatedly, this is not 1 victim:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acid_attack

Afghanistan

Such attacks or threats against women who failed to wear hijab, dress “modestly” or otherwise threaten traditional norms have been reported in Afghanistan.[111] In November 2008, extremists subjected girls to acid attacks for attending school.

https://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/14/world/asia/14kandahar.html

The attacks appeared to be the work of the Taliban, the fundamentalist movement that is battling the government and the American-led coalition. Banning girls from school was one of the most notorious symbols of the Taliban’s rule before they were ousted from power in November 2001.

The Levant

In 1983, acid attacks were reported to be carried out by Mujama al-Islamiya against men and women who spoke out against the Mujama in the Islamic University of Gaza.[123] Additional attacks by Mujama al-Islamiya were reported through 1986

During the First Intifada, Hamas and other Islamist factions conducted an organized intimidation of women to dress “modestly” or wear the hijab. Circulars were distributed specifying proper modest dress and behavior. Women who did not conform to these expectations, or to “morality expectations” of secular factions, were vulnerable to attacks which included pouring acid on their bodies, rock pelting, threats, and even rape.[125][123][126] B’Tselem has also documented additional attacks with acid in specific attacks involving women in a collaboration context.

In 2006–07, as part of a wider campaign to enforce Islamist moral conduct, the al-Qaida affiliated “Suyuf al-Haq” (Swords of Righteousness) claimed to have thrown acid on the faces of “immodestly” dressed woman in Gaza as well as engaging in intimidation via threats.

The Sharia code of qisas, or equivalence justice, required a caught perpetrator of acid violence to pay a fine and may be blinded with acid in both eyes.[7] Under Iranian law, victims or their families can ask a court’s permission to enact “qisas” either by taking the perpetrator’s life in murder cases or inflicting an equivalent injury on his or her body.[118] One victim, Ameneh Bahrami, sentenced her attacker to be blinded in 2008

if they reject things like being trafficked or having premarital sex with them, because that’s what those women are supposed to do within tbe religion

OK, so the reading comprehension thing was projection on your part. I’m saying here that Islam expects women to reject premarital sex and human trafficking, so they won’t be punished for performing to expectations by saying no to these things (which are not allowed in Islam and not okay with pretty much any Islamic person) - but Tate does this and is a recent convert to Islam. This defies Islamic teaching.

Tell me - do YOU think Tate is a good Muslim? Does he represent Muslim values?

It’s not absurd. It’s reality.

Sounds like I was correct, and there were more groups than just the Taliban that were listed anyway.

I wasn’t speaking “for” Muslims, I was pointing out the incongruence in Tate’s behavior and how that will clash with Muslim values and possibly extremists, made aware because he’s infamous.

No one talks about israeli oppression or bizarre jewish laws when speaking up against anti-sematism.

I wasn’t speaking up against Islamophobia. I was talking about how a recent convert to Islam, who is a horrible terrible human trafficker and rapist, is so bad that he may trigger the ire of extremists in the religion he joined TO SCAM PEOPLE via crypto. That’s why they were mentioned- as a comparison to Tate.

And I see Jewish hate often now that it’s cool to hate Israel, and Indian hate to a lesser degree. Further, you bringing up Jews and Indians - they are pretty classic groups many Muslims hate. So you’re entirely aware they indeed get criticism and that’s probably why you specifically mention them and not Christians. Seems racist of you.

“Hey, they have the right to live. Even though they are probably bombers, don’t harm them!” Tired of this bs

I wasn’t talking about rights. You’re tired of BS you’re inventing to be upset about, maybe stop doing that.

You’re welcome to disregard the NYT link and see the other examples listed.

It is. Asking someone, “Do you mind if I talk about this?” is cognitively and calorically the same as , “Can I kiss you?” “Do you like this?” “Is this okay?”

The damage done by unwanted sexual talk can be significant- eg Trump saying he and Ivanka have sex in common on Wendy Williams, or how he’d be dating her if she wasn’t his daughter on Howard Stern.

This is different than physical sexual abuse which not only has psychological harm (as before), it also has physical harm.

In general, having a light hearted conversation with friends whose general boundaries you’re already aware of, isn’t a big deal, just like saying “hey, everyone is cool with this right?” is also not a big deal to actually do but is still important.

Like I’m getting all this pushback for recommending people consider saying “You all good with this?” Lol

You said there’s many that are equivalent in the trauma and triggering. You can’t even name one other?

The one I can think of - war - is quite obvious you should check in with people and just say, “I know this is a topic that can be tough to talk about, do you mind?” Eg my friend’s entire family overseas just died to the war in Ukraine/Russia. Or someone’s dad may have died in a war. Etc.

So go on, name an example, just 1, of a topic that’s equivalent and explain why you wouldn’t want to just check in and make sure the person you’re talking with is comfortable.

Heck, asking you for an example of your own claim was apparently triggering af, maybe use that. Is this as traumatizing as war or sexual abuse? Giving an example?

There’s morally allowed abuses of women in some sects, but they have to be seen as justified in some regard - eg rejecting a MARRIAGE proposal might result in an acid attack

Yes, women aren’t going to be attacked by these same extremist men if they reject things like being trafficked or having premarital sex with them, because that’s what those women are supposed to do within tbe religion. They get attacked for things like rejecting Islam, rejecting hair covers, or rejecting MARRIAGE proposals - and the Tates aren’t marrying these women - that’s a big deal. They are acting way outside of the norms of Islam in general, even the extreme sides that don’t tend to treat women well.

And btw! I’m repeating info from LITERAL SURVIVORS OF ACID ATTACKS WHO ARE MUSLIM. So if they are Islamophobic, take it up with them.

Here, and I also never said it was widespread and was simply comparing the “worst” treatment of women in Islam to the treatment the Tates give women, and was comparing how their abuse of women is WELL outside of anything even extremists would tolerate. Premarital sex is a huge no no, especially trafficking women, filming them, pimping them- that’s HIGHLY offensive to Islamic beliefs. They are not compatible with the morals of Islam.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acid_attack

Afghanistan

Such attacks or threats against women who failed to wear hijab, dress “modestly” or otherwise threaten traditional norms have been reported in Afghanistan.[111] In November 2008, extremists subjected girls to acid attacks for attending school.

https://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/14/world/asia/14kandahar.html

The attacks appeared to be the work of the Taliban, the fundamentalist movement that is battling the government and the American-led coalition. Banning girls from school was one of the most notorious symbols of the Taliban’s rule before they were ousted from power in November 2001.

The Levant

In 1983, acid attacks were reported to be carried out by Mujama al-Islamiya against men and women who spoke out against the Mujama in the Islamic University of Gaza.[123] Additional attacks by Mujama al-Islamiya were reported through 1986

During the First Intifada, Hamas and other Islamist factions conducted an organized intimidation of women to dress “modestly” or wear the hijab. Circulars were distributed specifying proper modest dress and behavior. Women who did not conform to these expectations, or to “morality expectations” of secular factions, were vulnerable to attacks which included pouring acid on their bodies, rock pelting, threats, and even rape.[125][123][126] B’Tselem has also documented additional attacks with acid in specific attacks involving women in a collaboration context.

In 2006–07, as part of a wider campaign to enforce Islamist moral conduct, the al-Qaida affiliated “Suyuf al-Haq” (Swords of Righteousness) claimed to have thrown acid on the faces of “immodestly” dressed woman in Gaza as well as engaging in intimidation via threats.

Jihad means to fight against evil - Tate’s actions are evil in the eyes of Islam and most people in the world.

I don’t mean Sharia Law.

I never said acid attacks are justified. I’m saying that even to these men who attack women with acid, what the Tates are doing and did is abhorrent to even someone like that.

And here, about acid attacks by Islamic groups, there’s a bunch, idk why you all who literally don’t care about women even slightly have to act like you know anything about acid attacks or what women go through, but you have to deny it outright because…?

I gave sources further down the chain and already explained acid attacks are worldwide and not confined to Islam.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acid_attack

Afghanistan

Such attacks or threats against women who failed to wear hijab, dress “modestly” or otherwise threaten traditional norms have been reported in Afghanistan.[111] In November 2008, extremists subjected girls to acid attacks for attending school.

https://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/14/world/asia/14kandahar.html

The attacks appeared to be the work of the Taliban, the fundamentalist movement that is battling the government and the American-led coalition. Banning girls from school was one of the most notorious symbols of the Taliban’s rule before they were ousted from power in November 2001.

The Levant

In 1983, acid attacks were reported to be carried out by Mujama al-Islamiya against men and women who spoke out against the Mujama in the Islamic University of Gaza.[123] Additional attacks by Mujama al-Islamiya were reported through 1986

During the First Intifada, Hamas and other Islamist factions conducted an organized intimidation of women to dress “modestly” or wear the hijab. Circulars were distributed specifying proper modest dress and behavior. Women who did not conform to these expectations, or to “morality expectations” of secular factions, were vulnerable to attacks which included pouring acid on their bodies, rock pelting, threats, and even rape.[125][123][126] B’Tselem has also documented additional attacks with acid in specific attacks involving women in a collaboration context.

In 2006–07, as part of a wider campaign to enforce Islamist moral conduct, the al-Qaida affiliated “Suyuf al-Haq” (Swords of Righteousness) claimed to have thrown acid on the faces of “immodestly” dressed woman in Gaza as well as engaging in intimidation via threats.

I literally already did, it’s in the Wikipedia article I linked, in the region area. Clearly you didn’t bother to look.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acid_attack

Afghanistan

Such attacks or threats against women who failed to wear hijab, dress “modestly” or otherwise threaten traditional norms have been reported in Afghanistan.[111] In November 2008, extremists subjected girls to acid attacks for attending school.

https://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/14/world/asia/14kandahar.html

The attacks appeared to be the work of the Taliban, the fundamentalist movement that is battling the government and the American-led coalition. Banning girls from school was one of the most notorious symbols of the Taliban’s rule before they were ousted from power in November 2001.

The Levant

In 1983, acid attacks were reported to be carried out by Mujama al-Islamiya against men and women who spoke out against the Mujama in the Islamic University of Gaza.[123] Additional attacks by Mujama al-Islamiya were reported through 1986

During the First Intifada, Hamas and other Islamist factions conducted an organized intimidation of women to dress “modestly” or wear the hijab. Circulars were distributed specifying proper modest dress and behavior. Women who did not conform to these expectations, or to “morality expectations” of secular factions, were vulnerable to attacks which included pouring acid on their bodies, rock pelting, threats, and even rape.[125][123][126] B’Tselem has also documented additional attacks with acid in specific attacks involving women in a collaboration context.

In 2006–07, as part of a wider campaign to enforce Islamist moral conduct, the al-Qaida affiliated “Suyuf al-Haq” (Swords of Righteousness) claimed to have thrown acid on the faces of “immodestly” dressed woman in Gaza as well as engaging in intimidation via threats.

And I’m totally comfortable saying that there are Jewish extremist groups who commit terrorism to harm others as well. And there’s Christian and Buddhist groups that do that as well. It’s not antisemitic or Islamophobic to literally describe what people are doing, per survivors from those groups. That it makes those specific Islamic groups look bad is, well, on them. Don’t burn people with acid. Don’t genocide Gazans. Etc.

And as I’ve already said, yes, other people and other groups burn people with acid too. That’s not really relevant to my original comment though, which is about how Islamic sects will likely not tolerate someone like the Tates, even if those same people do other things that harm women. Yes, there is abuse of women in Islam with some groups, including acid attacks, but that abuse is often informed by the moral code of those practitioners and absolutely nothing the Tates do is justifiable by the religion. The idea of the Prophet Mohammed being okay with sex trafficking - that’s extremely offensive. It’s an extreme moral incompatibility that will likely result in conflict since he is harming real people pretty indiscriminately.

Good job, I AM happy with this misogynist’s suffering, which they deserve for being a misogynist imo.

There’s no such thing as a sex addiction.

They are pretty common on Lemmy tbh. I think like 4 months ago some guy on here was telling me it was “natural” to be attracted to 14 year olds. He got a bunch of upvotes, like at least 30 iirc. Lemmy is pretty disturbing tbh.

The idea that discussion of sex is itself a sexual act seems like it muddies the topic.

If it wasn’t a sex act, then phone sex workers wouldn’t exist, erotica wouldn’t exist.

There’s certainly ways of discussing sex that require consent, like erotic roleplaying

It’s called negotiations or initiation. These are abstract ways people talk about sex more clinically to see if people mesh or what kinks they have. People ABSOLUTELY get off to ANY discussion about sex. And that is a huge part of why some people only want to share thar side of themselves with safe people, especially if they aren’t an exhibitionist.

If any discussion of sex is taboo in public situations it leads to exactly the sort of issues OP is trying to reduce, where the norms of silence act as a shield for abusers.

Again, I assert it isn’t TABOO, but PRIVATE/PERSONAL. Just like my medical history isn’t taboo, it’s private and personal. It’s emotionally invasive to discuss sex with others for some people.

What shields abusers, ironically, is not discussing consent and not putting consent first. Also, the belief that abuse is automatically contagious- eg the belief a child who has been abused will go on to abuse another - which makes the victim feel like they ARE a monster like their abuser and makes them afraid to admit the abuse to others.

Abuse is literally handled by consent and boundary discussions, and additionally with straightforward biology and public health info (STIs are a sign of sexual abuse as well, via germ warfare and usually a lack of access to healthcare).

I talk with some friends about sex, and some friends not so much. I have friends who get stressed talking about anal, and one friend who gets extremely disturbed whenever someone brings up licking food off bodies as a sex act (she was tricked as a young child to do this).

As a Dominatrix, I have met people with such a wide variety of desires and pasts and traumas, that I think it’s best, if you want to have happy healthy discussions about sex, to just say something chill to make sure everyone is comfortable. There is just so much variety in the world and you have NO idea what kinks someone might have.

Ofc people make mistakes, they trigger others, I’m not suggesting the cops come out. I’m just pointing out that it is abuse, harmful, and that your friends may feel like healing from these interactions isn’t really worth being around you anymore. Because that’s the decision they are making if you trigger them and don’t care- how to enforce their boundaries.

Talking about sex needs to be done with some caution to not upset others

This is literally what I’m saying. Upsetting others means you are violating their emotional boundaries. If they do not consent to the interaction, then they might get mad.

It’s literally so easy to say, “hey, I’m going to bring up an adult topic, anyone uncomfortable with that?” And then if anyone says yes, say nevermind. its so easy and you all bellyaching like its a hike up a mountain is WEIRD.

Which other topics? List some

How so? How is the adjective Lusty, equivalent to forcing women and others to speak about sex when they don’t want to and feel uncomfortable about talking about it?