I’m normally not someone to post something like this, but in the spirit of contributing to the success of Lemmy, here goes:

This year for Valentine’s Day I included a large bag of my wife’s favorite chocolate as part of her gift. She happily put it in a bowl in our office so she could grab them while working.

Since then, I’ve been restocking the bowl whenever it starts getting low. I figured this would be a sweet gesture (no pun intended) that would put a small smile on her face once she noticed. Just a small thing to show how much I care about her.

Well, that’s not what happened. Yesterday she finally realized something fishy was going on with the bowl and confronted me on it. I admitted that, yes, I had been refilling it for her. She got upset, and said I’m an AH for “pranking” her like that. I tried to explain my reasoning, and I think it helped a bit, but she was still upset.

This is just devastating for me that my “kind” gesture could go so horribly wrong.

So, AITA here?

  • EntitledDatabase@discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
    91·
    2 years ago

    These comments in this thread are way too tame.

    So let me pull out the beloved AITA cutlery set: She’s of course fully aware that what you did was not a prank but a loving gesture. She’s gaslighting you, so she doesn’t have to admit that she ate more than she should have and intended to eat in the first place. You should know that gaslighting is common manipulation tactic of abusers like your wife. You are NTA obviously and you should get a divorce. (Where the hell is the red flag emoji here?)

    • shapesandstuff@feddit.deEnglish
      5·
      2 years ago

      before jumping to conclusions i’d just try asking her how/why it got to her in that way.
      But yeah lawyer facebook, delete the gym and hit the up.

    • Highbytes@kbin.social
      4·
      2 years ago

      Agreed but I think you should ask yourself whether it’s because she’s cheating. She turns the emotion back on you to mask her affair with the sexy green m&m

  • Tamilas@reddthat.comEnglish
    8·
    2 years ago

    Lawyer up. Divorce her!!1!

    Sorry, reddit habits die hard.

    NAH (No Assholes Here)

    What’s her relationship with food like? Has someone messed with her food before? It’s odd she jumped straight to prank rather than caring gesture. Seems you both handled a misunderstanding well.

  • Ozma_of_Oz@lemmy.worldEnglish
    3·
    2 years ago

    Did she say why she was upset? Is she worried she’s eating too many? Just that she thought it was a prank and not nice?

    I don’t think you’re an AH, but it does sound like your wife might be insecure about how much chocolate she’s been eating. I’m picturing her telling herself “I’ll let myself eat this much but then I’m back on a diet!” Or something to that effect. Then come to learn you’ve been foiling her plan in the background. Which is also something someone who is insecure about stuff might not want to say: that they are on a diet or worried about eating too much.

    All just a bunch of assuming.

    • Sporebat@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      5·
      2 years ago

      Her exact response when I asked her why she was upset was, “Can’t you see how that’s a mean prank to play on someone?”. She didn’t say much outside of that.

      • Ozma_of_Oz@lemmy.worldEnglish
        5·
        2 years ago

        Well it sounds like most of us really can’t! She’s probably just having a moment of irrationality as we all do from time to time. There’s probably something else going on but I doubt it’s worth it to try to figure it out.

  • Knoll0114@lemmy.worldEnglish
    2·
    2 years ago

    NTA she’s probably just insecure about having eaten the chocolate faster than she thought.

  • ArchmagosHeadass@lemmy.worldEnglish
    2·
    2 years ago

    NTA. But I feel like there is something else going on here. You should probably sit your wife down and have a face to face conversation about this because what she did is definitely off. Why would she be upset and thinks this a prank? IDK man this seems very suspicious.

  • HonestlyRainyGarden@lemmy.worldEnglish
    2·
    2 years ago

    NTA

    Sounds like an odd thing to be upset about. I don’t know why she’d be angry. Sounds like she might’ve thought she was going nuts and got angry out of embarrassment.

  • Galaxy@lemm.eeEnglish
    1·
    2 years ago

    NTA although I could understand her being confused by the infinitely refilling bowl of chocolate

  • Star @lemmy.worldEnglish
    1·
    2 years ago

    NTA She’s probably just upset with herself because she ate too much chocolate (in her opinion) and now feels badly about it. She feels the need to place blame somewhere, anywhere but on herself. I don’t think you did anything wrong. What you did was super sweet.

  • Radioaktvt@lemmy.oneEnglish
    1·
    2 years ago

    NTA. That’s just plain irrational. If someone brings me more and more of my favorite thing that’s considered being nice and thoughtful. How dare you be nice and thoughtful! Must be a prank. /s

  • Eladarling@lemmy.worldEnglish
    11·
    2 years ago

    INFO: why did she jump to the assumption that you were pranking her? Have you pulled pranks, jokes, teases, funny asides, or anything adjacent prior to this?

    • anonymous@lemmy.worldEnglish
      1·
      2 years ago

      hey just so you know, people post on AITA so they can know whether they did something wrong. Saying “you suck” isn’t going to bring encouragement, points, or happiness. Your downvotes are caused by your general childish attitude regarding OP, rather than just the opinion of who’s the AH. Just looking for a change of perspectives.